Monday, August 6, 2007

Fruit at the Bottom, Anger on Top

I enjoy a good yogurt. All kinds, all flavors. It’s nutritious and delicious. And it’s convenient. No preparation necessary. Open the lid, and you are spoon deep in velvety fruit goodness, unless your container is marked fruit-at-the-bottom.

Fruit-at-the-bottom yogurt is an unfinished product. They put the fruit in, they put the yogurt in, and then they quit. Why should I, the consumer, the end-user, have to blend the fruit-at-the-bottom into the rest of the yogurt? Why can’t it be fruit-at-the-top? Then, when I open it, I won’t have to see multiple layers of laziness. I won’t have to throw up a little in my mouth when I see the watery milky slime on the top. I won’t have to question whether I’ve adequately prepared the yogurt after I stir it for 5 minutes and it’s still white. Shouldn’t strawberry yogurt turn pink? Blueberry blue?

I buy yogurt because I DON’T want to make it. In this day and age of highly mechanized food preparation, they can’t mix it up even just a little? The fruit shouldn’t be at the bottom, or the top, or in the middle. It should be “fruit throughout”, and they should put it there – not me. Modern science allows microwavable meals, with MEAT in them, that require NO freezing or refrigeration, and yet I have to imagine my spoon as a little tiny boat oar so I can row myself to my culinary destination? I think not.

I will no longer support this half-ass dairy product.

I’m out –

KWass

6 comments:

Darrin Wassom said...

Half-ass dairy product - Classic! Nice rant.

Don said...

Personally, I prefer to *see* the fruit as opposed to blindly assuming that which is flavoring my pre-blended yogurt is actually fruit - it could simply be strawberry flavoring and red dye #9 for all I know. No sir ...keep your blended fruits, I'll mix my own and sleep better at night.

Anonymous said...

You look like you need to stop eating Yoghurt......
and everything else.Try steamed vegetables!

Unknown said...

This is genius. If only you were in charge of health care...

Unknown said...

This is brilliant. If only you were in charge of health care...

Anonymous said...

Blueberry and strawberry yogurt are basically white, unless you add artificial colorings. So, to answer your rhetorical question: no. That being said it originated as an industrial optimization, and I do not approve of it! I can buy my own jam to mix into sweetened yogurt, thank you very much.